Enlightenment is not about words and thoughts and concepts which can be doubted. Enlightenment is always Here.
By "Here" I don't mean this present space. Here is somewhere within where mind cannot reach. Presence is always Here and you are always That. This Here is not the opposite of "there." This Here is nowhere, it is your Heart. When mind is still all comes back to the Heart. All the cosmos is but a speck in your Heart.
Turn mind over into This Here and it is lost. Then only Light, Wisdom and Love remain and This you are not different or apart from.
~ Papaji
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I love Jesus, who said to us:
heaven and earth will pass away.
When heaven and earth have passed away,
my word will still remain.
What was your word, Jesus?
Love? Forgiveness? Affection?
All your words were
one word: Wakeup.
~ Antonio Machado
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Ninth Duino ElegyPraise the world to the angel: leave the unsayable aside.
Your exalted feelings do not move him.
In the universe, where he feels feelings, you are a beginner.
Therefore show him what is ordinary, what has been
shaped from generation to generation, shaped by hand and eye.
Tell him of things. He will stand still in astonishment,
the way you stood by the ropemaker in Rome
or beside the potter on the Nile.
Show him how happy a thing can be, how innocent and ours,
how even a lament takes pure form,
serves as a thing, dies as a thing,
while the violin, blessing it, fades.
And the things, even as they pass,
understand that we praise them.
Transient, they are trusting us
to save them - us, the most transient of all.
As if they wanted in our invisible hearts
to be transformed
into - oh, endlessly - into us.
Earth, isn't this what you want? To arise in us, invisible?
Is it not your dream, to enter us so wholly
there's nothing left outside us to see?
What, if not transformation,
is your deepest purpose? Earth, my love,
I want that too. Believe me,
no more of your springtimes are needed
to win me over - even one flower
is more than enough. Before I was named
I belonged to you. I seek no other law
but yours, and know I can trust
the death you will bring.
~ Rainer Maria Rilke ~
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I clean my teeth in water drawn from a cold well;
And while I brush my clothes, I purify my mind;
Then, slowly turning pages in the Tree-Leaf Book,
I recite, along the path to the eastern shelter.
...The world has forgotten the true fountain of this teaching
And people enslave themselves to miracles and fables.
Under the given words I want the essential meaning,
I look for the simplest way to sow and reap my nature.
Here in the quiet of the priest's temple courtyard,
Mosses add their climbing colour to the thick bamboo;
And now comes the sun, out of mist and fog,
And pines that seem to be new-bathed;
And everything is gone from me, speech goes, and reading,
Leaving the single unison.
Liu Zongyuan
773–819
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The Art of Seeking"Time is ticking. Fast, hurry, seek what you are trying to find!"
That is what I said to myself when my seeking hit the roof. I had to do something in order to achieve enlightenment.
It all started when I was 18 years. I started doing meditation after listening to a new age program on the Dutch radio station. I am 33 now and I did not know anything about enlightenment or spirituality or whatever you want to name it. So there I was, meditating for 5 minutes each day. Thoughts were all over the place, scattered as if they came from a bombshell. I read about Buddhism online and I did not understand anything about what they said.
I didn't know anything about God/Brahman/ Life itself. I was never a believer in the catholic God and thought going to church was kind of ignorance.
Going to heaven after I die? Was it my fault that I was born?
So I turned on the TV one night and Osho (an Indian mystic) said the following words 'you are not the doer, you are a watcher'. This trying to figure out who the doer was started right there that night.
So time flew but enlightenment and Self realization did not make any sense. When I was 27 or so, I typed the question on Google "who am I?" I came to an advaita site of Ramana Maharshi. It sounded good to me. As I went to YouTube, I found other advaita/non- duality teachers talk about it. When I listened to Tony Parsons saying 'everything just happens for no one', something clicked. Surely, hearing, smelling and feeling were happening on their own accord. If ever enlightenment was that easy! I couldn't believe it. I thought I had it. I thought that it happened to someone.
Darkness, separation and no Brahman/Source/ Life to be found anywhere!
Help! I saw myself as a separate doer, doing stuff in life, not knowing that that very thought of being a doer also was just perfectly happening on its own accord. SO I believed in this whole seeking mind game and all of its diverse thoughts. One day the mind started to talk in the 'you' form. So I wondered. Are there two separate selves?
But very recently things started to change. I had glimpses. They went away as fast as they came. I should be happy knowing that I was enlightened. I had it in my hands! I finally arrived.
Reality check!
Who is it that becomes enlightened?
Who is it that wants to get rid of the doer?
Who is it that seeks?
Isn't it so that all of these divine things are also happening perfectly?
So yes, writing this post is happening on by itself. And there is something still 'knowing' that it happens that doesn't require effort and pain. It is there.
This/Life itself is a knowing which knows:
- itching sensation on my left leg
- deep inhalation
- sounds
- tapping
- legs crossed on the ground
- coldness on the nose
- a thought saying ' if there is no one, who or better say what knows that this very thought is happening'
- smile
- humming of the PC
- moistening of lips
- blinking
- another thought saying why I wasn't aware of the blinking before
- laughter
- another thought saying that there is a noticing/ knowing that knows that I wasn't aware if there is an I!
So all of these things seem to happen and the 'you' cannot figure out this doership. You cannot surrender either or let go. It happens or not. In my case seeking was an obsession, like a day-job. The pre-thought 'I am going to wiggle my toe whenever I want' was my seeking experiment for 2 years but step by step in the story of Javier (if there is a step by step), there was an understanding that subtle actions were happening too, including concentration, sending imaginary signals to the toe, closing the eyes and forcing it to move the toe. Hilarious really but just OK. So there seems to be a process here NOW of dismantling subtle layers of belief and subtle thoughts of identification. So self inquiry into the doership can be the way. Or more correctly, there is no way ... there is only 'waying' by no one.
Life is living you. You are not having a Life. Of course, don't say this to an apparent anyone who believes they are separate. 'You' might end up in a separate isolation room!
It couldn't have happened in another way. So trust what you know or don't know. It is one big paradox!
~ Javier
http://beyond- advaita.blogspot .com/2011/ 04/art-of- seeking-by- javier.html